Friday, January 30, 2015

I Will Trust You


Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

It is 4:30 in the morning.  I wake with the immediate realization I must get up and get moving.  Today is the day when my husband, Danny, is scheduled to have his defibrillator replaced as the batteries in his old one are in serious decline.  Although we don't need to be at the hospital until 7:30, Atlanta interstate traffic demands an early departure in case we run into accidents or other unforeseen tie-ups along the way.

The drive down I-75 is crowded, but moving.  It is dark and misting, causing brake lights and headlights to blur and dance erratically before my eyes.  This, along with the worry I feel regarding Danny's impending surgery, makes me queasy.  I find myself wishing we were not in this place and time, wishing we didn't have to face these moments of uncertainty.

Then, I hear it.  A snippet from one of the praise songs we have recently learned for contemporary service.  I will trust you . . .

A whisper, a heartbeat.  I will trust you . . .

A promise, a prayer.  I will trust you . . .

And for the life of me, I cannot recall from which song these lyrics come, these words which now resound in my soul.  Yet resound, they do.  And every time they swirl up into my conscious thought, I feel God's peace surrounding me.  Surrounding us.

I am calmed.

Danny seems to be, too.  Handling traffic like a pro.  Not a drop of water or coffee in his system, yet sailing smoothly into the unknown.

I will trust you . . .

Pastor Wallace arrives to pray with us before Danny's surgery, and then stays with me for the duration.  We never run out of topics to discuss, and I a blessed by his dedicated presence which calms me even further and assures me:  I will trust.  I can trust!

Not an hour has passed before the surgeon, Dr. S., enters the waiting area, a broad smile on his face, and motions us to accompany him to the recovery room.  "Everything went great," Dr. S. assures us.  "Danny is still a bit groggy, but you can talk to him.  It will help him come around quicker."

There are no words for the relief that washes over me the moment I see Danny!  Pastor Wallace and I tell him, honestly, how great he looks (even though we can tell it's a struggle for him to stay awake), and Wallace teases him, "Doc says he has two remote controls, one for me and one for Martha.  You'll be behaving yourself from now on!"

Danny manages a smile and a chuckle at this quip.  Before he departs, Pastor Wallace prays with us once again, thanking God for His mercies today and for Danny's continued healing.  Three hours later, Danny and I are home, so thankful to have this ordeal behind us.

Through the day, however, as much as I will trust you runs in a comforting loop in my thoughts, the song from whence it came has yet to surface.  In my heart, I know it doesn't matter as these were the only words I needed to hear today, yet my mind isn't willing to let it rest.  I sit on our deck, breathing the chilly air gratefully,  and I close my eyes.  I listen . . .

Lord, whatever comes my way, I will trust you . . .  More of the song!  Which song?

From beginning to the end, I will trust you . . .

I jump up and dash indoors.  "Danny!  I remembered some more!"  I share the lyrics I recall, and grab for my hefty church music book.  Frantically, I begin flipping through the alphabetically arranged pages.  Scanning them hastily.  I haven't gotten past the "D" section when Danny, after a successful Google search, announces, "Sovereign!  It's Sovereign."

Thrilled at his answer, I shove my hand into the place in the giant tome where I think the "S" songs should be.

And. I. Turn. Right. To. It.

Tears of joy spill over.  God met me today in my time of uncertainty.  And although I'm ecstatically grateful to finally read all the words in the song, I know in my heart God gave me the only ones that mattered in the moment.  That matter always.

I will trust you . . .

~

Are you trusting in the Lord, and leaning not upon your own understanding?

Prayer:  Father, may we learn to always lean on You and submit to Your will, knowing You will make straight our paths and provide us with Your comfort and grace.  Let us always give thanks and praise to You, no matter what circumstances we may be in, and listen for Your still, small voice which ever whispers the words we need to hear.  In Jesus' name, we pray.  Amen.

You can listen to the song, Sovereign, here.

18 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thanks, Julie! Me, too!!!
      Love and blessing to you!

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  2. Another amazing post, Martha! Trust. I seem to be continually running into that word in the opening days/weeks of this year. Trust. I'm to trust God with the whole of my life. It's a learning process, that is for sure! Thankfully God is a very patient teacher. Trusting God to provide for my needs will indeed take me to new levels in a variety of senses.

    Love and blessings!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, Kim! Yes, learning to trust in God is a learning process. I truly believe that this experience with Danny's surgery took me to an entirely higher level for which I am eternally grateful. And if you stop to think about it, He has all of our lives in His hands and knows the lessons we most need to learn.
      Love and blessings!

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  3. Proverbs 3:5-6 is among my favorites. It’s one that I’ve require my daughter to memorize, for in life it’s always been a lifesaver for me and I wouldn’t want her to go through life without it.

    It’s interesting, how song lyrics surface from a deep place within when you need them most, isn’t it? This lets us know that we hold ‘truth in our innermost being’ Psalm 51:6.

    Off subject a minute – or maybe not. Would you vote for Huckabee - should he run? Or would you have another preference? This subject is one we seriously need to consult with the Lord about, wouldn’t you agree?

    Have a blessed weekend, Martha!

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    1. Oh, Deborah, what an amazing God-incidence! I just met Governor Huckabee today at a local book signing for his latest - God, Guns, Grits, and Gravy. He is as gracious and sincere in person as he is on television. I gave him my novels as a gift of thanks and he was genuinely delighted to have them. And I do mean GENUINELY! If he runs, he has my vote, hands down. In fact, I have every intention of working for his campaign here in Georgia if it comes to that, which I hope it will. Now that Romney has decided not to run, I think it offers Mike a real chance in the field. Let us continue to pray that the Lord will give us a Godly man as our next president.
      Love and blessings!

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  4. Your faith is inspiring. I enjoyed this post. :) It's been awhile-I've been out of the blogging loop..Glad I visited your blog today! Looking forward to more posts!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for your kind words, dear friend! I'm glad you are back to blogging and I look forward to following you as well!
      Love and blessings!

      Delete
  5. My favorite Christian radio station is having its annual fundraiser right now and is sharing stories just like this one: where listeners hear just the right words of a song on the radio just when they needed it. God sends his love in music, doesn't he? glad to hear everything worked out well too Martha. Have a great weekend.

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    1. He so often sends us His love through music! Glad you enjoyed the post today, Jean. Thanks, as always, for stopping by and leaving your thoughts.
      Love and blessings!

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  6. I will trust you. Good words for ANY time. Thanks for sharing your lesson Martha Jane. Thanks also for the song. Since I tend to listen to CDs (I do listen to Air1 when I can get it) and more rocky music I often miss songs like this. It is a good one.

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    Replies
    1. Yes, those words ARE good any time, Bill! Glad you enjoyed the song, too. Our praise band leans toward doing the rockier types of songs, but this one was too beautiful not to learn.
      Love and blessings!

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  7. Hi Martha! I am coming over from Jean's blog.
    What an intense time for you and your husband! I am so happy that the repeated word 'trust' didn't leave you, and gave you peace. I can't help but think that your pastor is such a wonderful person. To spend so much time with you, and pray too. You were covered in God's care.

    So glad it all went well for your husband. And that you found that song! May we all sing in our souls to the glory of God, and his great love for us.
    Nice to meet you!
    Ceil

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    1. Welcome, Ceil, I'm so glad you stopped by today; it's nice to meet you, too!
      Yes, we were blessed to have Pastor Wallace with us during the procedure - he is definitely a minister who walks the walk. :)
      And let us, as you said, "sing in our souls to the glory of God, and his great love for us." Perfect!
      Love and blessings!

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  8. Martha, I'm so glad Danny is doing well. "I will trust You." A good way to live every day. I am making that my prayer each morning. Blessings and hugs!

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    Replies
    1. I'm glad he's doing so well, too! I just read your blog today about how important prayer was/is for so many in your family - I was so touched!
      I'm happy to know you've added "I will trust You" to your daily prayers. It is the best way to go!
      Love and blessings!

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  9. Martha, so glad to hear of Danny's successful procedure. It's so hard sometimes to trust God when we are confronted with fearful things. But, He holds on to us no matter what!

    These verses from Proverbs are my *life verses* - and I hold on to them like a life preserver. So many things are happening in my life right now, so many that I don't understand. Things that require decisions which I have no idea what's the best thing to do.

    "I will trust You."

    It seems that these words are my prayer, my hope, and my source of peace.

    GOD BLESS.

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    1. Sharon, I'm glad to know that these are your "life verses." They are sure to see all of us through the troubled and anxious times. And when all is said and done, there is truly nothing left for us to do but trust that the Lord has everything in His unfailing hands. I pray God will help you to make the right decisions in each challenge you are currently facing.
      Love and blessings!

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