Friday, May 27, 2016

Sandwiched!


Leviticus 19:3
Each of you must respect your mother and father, and you must observe my Sabbaths.  I am the Lord your God.

Ever since my father passes in March of 2014, I call my mother daily.  Five-thirty in the evening is our set time to reconnect, to share news, even though her new hearing aids don't always function the way they should.  It's often me listening to her than she listening to me, but it's all good.

My brother, Bill, calls her later in the evening of each day, too.  So the good news is Mom knows we are faithfully there for her.

Bill and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Can this repetitious, daily routine ever be an inconvenience?  Honestly, yes.  Especially when my husband, Danny, and I are out of town, on vacation, trying our best to leave the cares and concerns of this world behind us if only momentarily.  The call back to reality places that fantasy in check.

Checkmate.

In our sixties, with grown children, grandchildren and aging mothers, Danny and I find ourselves in the proverbial cross-hairs of being there for everybody whenever a need arises.  Following the teachings of God, we're not about to let anyone down, but it can sure wear and tear at the fabric of our souls.

Frankly, not a day goes by when I don't need the reassurance of the Lord that I'm, that we're, doing the right thing in His eyes.  In His Spirit.  In His truth.

There is nothing I would deny my mother, my mother-in-law, my children, my stepsons, my granddaughters.  I am willing to move heaven and earth for their sake at any given moment.

But I have to admit this.  Sometimes it's difficult, not to mention uncomfortable, to be the meat squished between two slices of generational bread.  Could I have mustard, please?  Mayonnaise?  Maybe a pickle?  Anything to make this place in life a bit more palatable?

It's a tough scenario.

One many of us have faced or will face in the future.

We will wish for mayonnaise when we are given mustard.  We will long for white bread when given rye.

But we know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, no matter how our meat is dressed, God is in it all.  And because of that knowledge, we will continue to freely offer our sandwich selves up to those whom we love, respect and value beyond measure.

~

Where are you feeling "sandwiched" in your life?

Prayer:  Father, when it comes to helping family, may we never feel the emotion of inconvenience.  Yes, it will be hard at times, but let us recall Your undying love for us, a love that knows neither limits nor bounds.  May we never cease to treasure that love and be quick to offer it to others.  In Jesus' name, we pray.  Amen.





10 comments:

  1. I've lived there for so long it is really the only world I know. Sometimes, when I wish things were easier, I remember that they could be harder and for that I am thankful.

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    Replies
    1. Amen, Carol! Things can always be more difficult, and we should be grateful they are not!
      Love and blessings!

      Delete
  2. Martha, it sounds like you and Danny have a healthy perspective on things. As an only child it was hard on me when my mom demanded my full attention (she also tried her hardest to control and manipulate)--of course I lived with her (not by choice). It was hard to get away, because she expected me to call multiple times and talk for an extended time each time.

    Now that she has been with the Lord for eight years, I can only hope that I did what I could do, while having my own life.

    Thank you for sharing this very realistic post.

    Love and blessings!

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    Replies
    1. Kim, I'm sure you were a dutiful daughter in every way to your Mom. We try to have a healthy perspective, but there are times when I get exasperated and have to quickly, and sincerely, ask God's forgiveness for my shortcomings.
      There were several times in my adult life where things got really hard, and I contemplated moving with my two children back in with my parents, at least for a while. But God would always gently remind me that He would meet my needs, and that I shouldn't forego being as independent as possible.
      All that being said, I'm glad, bottom line, that I can be there for her now.
      Love and blessings!

      Delete
  3. Thank for sharing your struggle and perspective Martha. This sounds like a divine sandwich :) both challenging (spicy) and filled with love (appetizing).

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Vishnu, for your kind words. Sometimes my sandwich doesn't look so divine, and I do struggle more than I care to admit, but with God in it all, I know I can make it!
      Love and blessings!

      Delete
  4. The sandwich generation is such an appropriate name too. I used this expression just the other day in a writers critique group - let's sandwich our remark - something good/positive, a suggestion, then another positive comment. Living each day like that sandwiched by the positive isn't a bad way to live! I realized this week that my mom has been gone 40 years - I know it is difficult to watch them grow old but treasure those phone calls.

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    Replies
    1. Jean, I love this perspective of the positive sandwich - yes! I did see the photo of your mother that you posted on Facebook. I know you miss her to this day, and I will take your advice, my friend, and cherish my talks with Mom.
      Love and blessings!

      Delete
  5. Oh Martha, how I know of what you speak! I have heard it said that our generation is sometimes called "The Sandwich Generation" - and I truly believe that. I once wrote a blog post entitled, "I Am a Piece of Bologna" - because I also feel like a slab of meat squeezed too tight at times. I often say that I wear a lot of hats - daughter, caregiver, wife, mother, mother-in-law, grandmother. Sometimes I get so tired, and wonder what on earth happened to my *Sharon Hat*!

    My heart echoes all your emotions - the feeling of responsibility and dedication to doing the best for our widowed mothers, and our husbands, and the rest of our families.

    And when we feel that we cannot take another step, God is there with arms to uphold us - and sometimes to carry us.

    It's good to remember this - When we find ourselves in a *pickle*, God will always *mayo-ke* a way to *mustard* our strength for the journey ahead.

    Sorry. Couldn't resist...

    GOD BLESS!

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    Replies
    1. Sharon, your puns are absolutely delightful!!! I'm glad you didn't resist sharing them - you made my day!
      And yes, there are many times I feel I can't find my Martha Hat. But this, too, shall pass, and probably too quickly. So, so thankful to know that God has my steps, and my hats, in His competent and loving hands.
      Love and blessings!

      Delete

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