Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. ~Proverbs 4:9-10
For those of you who have followed my blog since January of 2024, you are likely aware of the medical issues Danny and I have been dealing with, day in and day out. New readers, you can read the details of this traumatic beginning to 2024 HERE.
Everything goes better than we could ever hope for or expect with the replacement of Danny's pacemaker, but he is saddled with a severe case o medical PTSD as a result. Both our lives are upended by this in ways we cannot imagine at the time. No longer does Danny feel safe going anywhere alone, or even staying home alone, so I'm his constant companion. This disrupts our usual routines tremendously.
All of our appointments have to be coordinated so nothing is a conflict. Whereas, I haven't been to the grocery stores with Danny for what seems like ages, I'm now intimately familiar with every aisle and items in the several we frequent. Doing our own thing simply doesn't fly anymore. Is this frustrating at times? Of course, it is. I'd be lying if I told you differently.
And don't get me started on those first couple of weeks after his surgery when Danny's not allowed to drive. Poor guy! He's not a good passenger (and will be the first to admit it), and I find out, in the process, that my driving isn't as great as I think it is. But we survive that time together, none the worse for wear, and now I am so relieved that he's back behind the wheel where he belongs.
However, being in the driver's seat does not mean long trips on busy highways as he used to be able to do, and I could never do with confidence. That's okay. We've had our fair share of sweet mountain get-away trips, and now our family members travel to see us. I'd say that's a win-win for those of us who aren't getting any younger!
Last year (December) on his birthday, I want Danny to know more than anything that all the trials and tribulations we face can be overcome because we have faith in God and in each other. I need to express my gratefulness to him and to our generous Father who placed our life paths on the same trajectory over twenty years ago. The decorative pillow, featured at the top of this post, is my gift to him because I think those three little words say it all. Danny completely agrees.
Yes, two are most definitely better than one, as Proverbs 4:9 states, but when God holds those two souls in His hands, they become the threefold cord that cannot be easily broken (Ecclesiastes 4:22). For as many more years that the Lord has in store for us, Danny and I will hold onto each other's hands and look to God for strength and hope, love and guidance. I can't think of a better way to live, can you?
Amen!
As a pastor it is always refreshing to hear of two people who love each other. Even though we have never met in person, I am honored to call you friend and am thrilled to know of two people who love each other in spite of the trials we all can expect to face some day. The pillow says it all. I tell Jo "I love you to the moon and back." Keep love alive Martha! It is an example to your family and to others.
ReplyDeleteThat's a phrase, " I love you up to the moon and back," that my grandmother and mother used to say. I love it, Bill! And I'm sure that Jo feels blessed when she hears it from you. Thanks, too, for your kind words about Danny's and my relationship being an example to others. It truly isn't as easy as it sounds, as many of us will admit, but we're in it for the long haul.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Even with physical problems (and we all have them as we get older), life is always better together. After almost 52 years, I can't imagine it any other way. I've been supremely blessed. (And thank you for the review! I am so glad you enjoyed it, and you said some wonderful things.)
ReplyDeleteOh, yes, Glynn, none of us can escape the problems that come with aging. How delightful that you've been with Janet for 52 years - wow!!! What a testimony to love and commitment that is for all of us. And yes, everything I said about Brookhaven is exactly what I feel; thanks for being patient with me about being so late in reviewing it.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Life is a series of adjustments, isn’t it, Martha? Praying for both of you.
ReplyDeleteIt definitely is, Diana. Thanks for your prayers!
DeleteLove and blessings!
I love how marriage is a partnership built on love, trust and unwavering support. Reading this, reminded me of a situation my youngest daughter and her husband has dealt with the past two years. In short, at the age of 45, she had a heart attack (thank goodness it was mild) but it left her with so much anxiety. After seeing a specialist that deals with PTSD, she is much better. My heart hurts for you and Danny. Life brings both sunshine and storms, but walking hand in hand makes the journey easier. Hold onto your Faith and lean on one another for reassurance that God is able.
ReplyDeleteOh, my, Shug, what a frightening thing for the two of them to endure and scary for all of you! I'm so glad they are getting through the aftermath together as a couple. PTSD is an all too real affliction for so many, even those of us with strong faith. Tell your daughter that, truly, Danny and I know how she feels and will pray for her and her husband.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Thank you for your candor, dear Martha ... helping me understand a little better what Tom may be feeling. I'm not fond of change, and to be honest, sometimes resent the physical changes we're both experiencing. I need to focus more on your sampler. Two are better than one!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Myra, for your kind comment here. I'm not fond of change either, but at our age things will happen that we cannot foresee. Just hold on to one another with love and keep looking up to the One who made it all possible.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I immediately thought “Attached at the hip”—- and that’s not bad at all. As someone who is alone a great deal i say “ GOOD for you!” Love requires sacrifice- the kind of sacrifice where you don’t count the cost. You are a shining example of what love should look like!
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
Lulu
Oh, Lulu, you are too kind in your sweet words here. Love does require sacrifice, indeed. We don't often see it when we are lost in the headiness of falling in love, but as circumstances change, for better or for worse, it's the hanging in there that matters. Yes, we've been on that roller coaster called life.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Re. not being able to think of a better way to live, I'm totally with you guys in that regard and praise the Lord that you guys share the kind of love that makes whatever adjustments are necessary to protect each other and to keep the relationship you share together from becoming collateral damage when physical and/or medical issues invade your lives. Diane and I got an email from another writer friend this morning who's going through the trial of putting his wife on hospice care and wondering every day whether it will be their last one together in this world. Getting older has it's incredible blessings, but there are challenges awaiting us that will call for strength we don't have. Thank God for His promise to do in and through us things we simply cannot do on our own. May blessings abound for you and Danny as you find victories together with Jesus and each other.
ReplyDeleteSuch profound words of wisdom you have shared here today, dear friend. Each morning, I thank God for another day to be here for Him and to love Danny as much as I possibly can each moment. The excruciating sadness your close friend must be feeling, not knowing when the inevitable will happen breaks my heart. But we know, as believers, that God can call us home at any time, and we have no control over His timing. As we age, every good day is a blessing, and we are both grateful to the Lord for allowing us to love and be loved.
DeleteLove and blessings!
So sorry about Danny's struggles.
ReplyDeleteHe is doing much better at this point in time, Christine, but yes, it has been a monumental struggle. Healing takes time, sometimes longer than we imagine or expect, but we will continue to love God, each other, and be thankful for each day we have together.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I am a caregiver of my husband too. That's why I started my sub stack. The caregiver poet. We are lucky you and I that we met because I definitely feel your support and feel the same. You are in my prayers both of you. You and I are very lucky having the conviction that not a sparrow falls without the attention of angels. Aloha my friend bless you
ReplyDeleteEver since you let me know about your own situation, I've kept you in my prayers, too, Cloudia. I'm so thankful that we met online and can be there for one another whenever possible through blogging. We know beyond a shadow of a doubt that when we place ourselves and our future in God's hands, He will never fail nor forsake us.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I am praying for you and Danny. You are an example to many couples these days. Thank you for being so and for teaching the world the true meaning of marriage.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you both.
The good Lord knows, Victor, that my previous marriage was not one to tout to anyone. I was not a Christian at that time. I was blessed to meet and marry a Christian man after that, but the Lord had other plans for him as he died of a freak head injury. It's so difficult to say, at times, "Thy will be done," but in the long haul, we must ever trust that our loving Father knows what is best for us. I did have much to learn, and those lessons are invaluable.
DeleteLove and blessings!
You are very courageous. As I said, an example to others.
DeleteWow, I had no idea that could happen. Rick has a pacemaker and defibrillator. Was it the defibrillator that was shocking him or the pacemaker? I would feel the same way myself. I watch Rick like a hawk - but not as much as you do I am sure. You do have a lot of love.
ReplyDeleteDefibrillator - the shocking thing.
DeleteChatty, Danny was always right up front with me before we got married that he had had a heart attack and that he might become a "burden" in our future. When you know you love someone, you stay the course because I felt that God had most definitely sent Danny to me. I'm so looking forward to meeting the both of you this coming Friday - I know we will find so much in common, for sure!
DeleteLove and blessings!
After I had my stroke, it took me a long time to get my confidence back. One thought that I always had, was that God never gives us more than we can handle. In tough times, my thoughts go back to that and that relaxes me and I know I will be alright. I am always grateful that I have a wife who cares deeply for me and helps me along.
ReplyDeletePrayers for you and Danny.
Thank you so much for your prayers, Bill. They are treasured by the both of us. You are so right - God doesn't give us more than we can handle, but in the tough times, longs for us to cleave closer to Him. He will be with us always and can always understand the pains we suffer, all because He chose to live as on of us.
DeleteLove and blessings!
thecontemplativecat here. May God bless you and wrap His Hands around you. this spoke on many issues we are facing. Doctor appt. have become a ballet . Migraines have been with me forever, since I was 4 yr. old. My good husband has been my guide, my best friend, and my love.
ReplyDeleteOh, Susan, your candid and touching comment here about what you have suffered and your husband's support of you as guide, friend and love is what God intends for us. I pray that the heartfelt words you have shared here today will touch many hearts who are struggling with chronic pain or disease, and love one another all the more.
DeleteLove and blessings!
You are living proof that with Christ, we really CAN endure all things. Thank you, Martha, for your example of sacrificial love, perseverance, strength, and the power of a positive attitude! P.S. We also survived a spell when my husband couldn't drive for three months. It was not an easy time for us either!
ReplyDeleteOh, Nancy, I so hear you about that driving part of it! Danny is probably one of the most patient people I've ever known, but I about wore his out with my lack of skill and finesse. Marriages, unfortunately, have broken up for less - LOL! With Jesus as our cornerstone, may we all lay firm foundations in our relationships.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Thank you all for the kind comments.
ReplyDeleteYou know how special my blogging friends are to me, Danny, and now you actually see it first hand! :)
DeleteMy music is here in case your interested ---> https://soundcloud.com/danny-orlando-355102553
ReplyDeleteDanny has such musical talent, my friends, I hope you will take time to listen.
DeleteIt can take a damn long time for some to feel confident enough to do things on their own again or to just be on their own again. My sister Jeannie discovered that after her partner suffered two brain aneurysms ruptures.
ReplyDeleteOh, Jo-Anne, that must have been a most traumatic time for your sister, Jeannie! Is she doing okay now? Getting over situations like this is not a matter of mind over matter, but mind focused on God and His promise. Danny is better now than I ever imagined he would be, and for that, we are both immensely grateful.
DeleteLove and blessings!
So sorry all that's happened for y'all. I totally sympathize. Traumatic things always happen which change the dynamics of any relationship. Like when that ambulance ride changed me (the ketamine event!). It's a psychotic drug that was administered during the ride without any warning about what it is. It's nasty stuff. It should be banned. I feel like it rewired me and not in a good way. I've had to pray my way back (or nearly back) to what I was emotionally, mentally, physically before May 8th last year. It's been a hard road. Keep moving forward and praying. God loves us and cares. Blessings. ❤️
ReplyDeleteOh, Sparky, I had no idea before this what you've been through, personally and physically, dear one! It takes so much courage to share on a public blog post, and for that, more power to you through God who has given you that strength and fortitude. He always takes our weaknesses and makes us strong in Him. I do know the hurricanes last year laid waste to your part of the country, yet your bravery and determination is inspirational to all of us who face setbacks of all kinds. Thank you for sharing your heartfelt thoughts here.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I appreciate this post so much today, Martha. I understand exactly what you are saying and feeling. It seems that in the past couple of years we have become more and more like this...I rarely go anywhere alone anymore and even some of my women's activities at church I have had to forego. Tonight I am staying home from choir practice (which you all know I love) because hubby still isn't exactly feeling 100% better. But he refuses to let me take him to the dr. to see what's going on. I told him that if he's not a lot better tomorrow we are going regardless of what he says. We'll see who wins on this one. But the aging process is not without its issues...especially when one is starting to feel insecure about his health and doesn't want to be alone. I am trying to be very cognizant of this and making those sacrifices. I'm thankful we have our blogging friends here that we can relate to and have an outlet for conversation and encouragement and friendship because sometimes we just can't manage to do the in person activities that we used to do. I will keep you and Danny in my thoughts and prayers. I love that pillow, and I love your attitude as well. May God give each of us wisdom in these kinds of days...
ReplyDeleteOh, yes, Pamela, may God, who knows our every need, give us the wisdom to make right decisions when we can't trust our own feelings to act in the best interest of those we love. The journey that John and you have been on recently so mirrors our own here. I do love that the blogging allows us to reach out and touch the hearts of others as we strive to accomplish God's kingdom here on earth. It all starts with love and with love is where it all ends. Know I'm praying for the both of you, dear one!
DeleteLove and blessings!
Martha, you and Danny are in my daily prayers and will remain there! I am sorry for what you are going through. Thanks for sharing your concerns and pain with us. It is a hard journey for you both but you aren't alone and I know your faith is strong. Sending a hug. I wish I lived closer and could help!! xo
ReplyDeleteTerri, I so wish we lived closer, too! I would love nothing better than to meet you, Pamela and Barbara in person. That can't happen now, but please know that your prayers are such a gift and lift to my heart and soul. And on a lighter note, guess what? Chatty Crone lives in Kennesaw, and we will be meeting up this Friday, God willing. Know a blog about that will soon follow.
ReplyDeleteLove and blessings!
Martha, what a godly example. Not easy but truly loving as God intended. We're coming up to our 54th anniversary in June, Lord willing. God is good, and we learn that even more as we age and serve each other.
ReplyDeleteWow, Vickie, that's so impressive! You are a testament to long love in a relationship and faith that God will see you through every twist and turn of life.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Your love, faith, and commitment to each other are truly inspiring. Wishing you both strength, peace, and many more blessed years together. 🙏❤️
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Veronica, for your kind and caring words here today.
DeleteLove and blessings!
This is a beautiful testimony of taking care of each other every day, through good times and bad ones. God bless you both!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mrs. White, for your lovely words here.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Love to you and Danny. You two were made for each other. Man can cook too! You both are blessed beyond measure.
ReplyDeleteOh, how I know it, Debra! God has given us His grace and mercy in putting us together.
DeleteLove and blessings!
This is beautiful, Martha. Two are better than one, especially those of us who are united with each other through Christ. You and Danny have had a rough year health-wise and thankful the Lord has been with you both and you've had each other to lean on. The Holy one in holy matrimony is Jesus. God bless.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your affirming comment here, Karen. It has been a rough time for both of us, but because of God's grace, we've come out better for it together. Leaning on Jesus!
DeleteLove and blessings!
I have been doing the driving, cooking, shopping, etc, for some time now. Jill has not been able to drive or do many of the things she used to do. It has drawn us closer together than ever. The good Lord knows what He is doing for sure. God bless you both.
ReplyDeleteHugs and Blessings
Oh, Jim, thank you for feeling confident enough to share your own personal experience with your dear wife, Jill, here with us. Aging is hard enough, but knowing there are other caring believers like you out there who are in the same circumstance gives courage and assurance to others, like Danny and myself, who are going through the same thing. His love never fails and He always knows best.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Bom dia, Martha
ReplyDeleteVocês formam um belo casal. Lindo versículo, "melhor é serem dois do que um". Cada um ajuda o outro nas adversidades, dando força e coragem. Que o Senhor continue abençoando vocês com saúde, amor e alegria. Gostei de saber que o nome do teu blog foi inspirado no Salmo 19:14, que bênção. Um forte abraço.
Thanks so much, Lucinalva, for your sweet words here. We all must learn to rely on one another in good times and bad. God wants us to live loving Him and those He places near us on our journeys. Yes, Danny is such a gift and blessing to me.
DeleteLove and blessings!
It's amazing the things we can do when we are called to do them. The things that I do now routinely in my 70s are so not I ever dreamed in my younger years. Grateful for strength and support from Go'd and loved ones. My best to you and Danny and prayers and wishes for good health.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your good thoughts and prayers, Carol. We are all in the same boat, it seems, when we hit our seventies. I, too, am so grateful for the strength that comes only from God.
DeleteLove and blessings!
It all sounds very stressful to me. Sending prayers. I am dealing with several medical issues and I find it difficult to leave the house. I had to quit bowling and miss my social life. It will be months before all of my medical issues will be solved. This has given me terrible anxiety and depression. God help us.
ReplyDeleteOh, Debby, please know that I will definitely keep you in my prayers as you are facing so many medical challenges. It is stressful when we find ourselves getting older and those ailments keep on coming. Thanks for taking a moment to comment here today, my friend.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I am sorry to hear of the trouble you two are going through and yet thankful at the same time because you are seeing good things despite trouble! I pray he will recover and regain his strength in due time. May the Lord keep you and bless you and shine His face upon you and give you peace.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Marja, for your kind and caring words here today, not to mention your blessing. Yes, Jesus never said life would be easy, but He promised to walk with us every step of the way. That's what gives us both the strength and peace to keep moving forward with love for one another.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I love us - wow that is such a blessing. You have a huge loving heart. This post just made my day!! Bless you dear Martha!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm both glad and humbled that this post made your day, Jean. Thanks for your kind comments here, my friend.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Conversation and consideration will make you healthier.
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed!
DeleteLove and blessings!
oh it was a year for you, wasn't it. i am so sorry ... some things seem to go on and on, especially as we get older. i love how you're teaming up with him, encouraging him, taking care of some of the things he might have done before. thank God HE never changes, has medical issues, or ages. i'm finding more and more that this is not only a great truth, but a tremendous comfort.
ReplyDeletepraying for you both right now, friend.
xo
Thanks so very much for your prayers, Linda! The good Lord knows how much we need them as we move forward in our lives. When I read your post with a photo of your same pillow, I just knew it was meant for Danny, so I could affirm that I was in it for the long haul. Thanks for that, too!
DeleteLove and blessings!
Keeping in prayer my friend...I do hope you have a beautiful week ahead.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Linda, for your prayers.
DeleteLove and blessings!
This is beautiful post Martha jane. Sending you my everyday prayers.
ReplyDeleteI so appreciate your prayers, Snobe.
DeleteLove and blessings!
How interesting that you would share this about "medical PTSD." Something similar is going on here (I won't explain) so it helps to have you write this. God knows. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI'm humbled by your words here, Barbara. God does know what we need before we ever could, and is faithful to supply those needs.
DeleteLove and blessings!
Back again but having some issues with changed settings.
ReplyDeleteHugs and Blessings
Glad to hear it, Jim.
DeleteLove and blessings!
I love your pillow! What a beautiful gift!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you liked the pillow, Cheryl. It is and was the perfect gift for us.
DeleteLove and blessings!